"We gave them the songs of the Beatles," says Ryan. And they gave 'em back like someone returning a dress to the Gap after wearing it on a date with the tags on. Kellie Pickler! Why am I not excited? THIS is American Idol?
Mentors! Dolly! Mariah! Gross Andrew Lloyd Webber! The one and only Neil Diamond! "This Is My Now," or as I like to call it, "This Is My No"!
Up With People brings us more Beatles songs, because we are not sick of them. I enjoy the irony of watching David C. and Jason sing "While My Guitar Gently Weeps." Not Lennon/McCartney! Notice they're not saying "Lennon/McCartney" as much as they were last week, like that makes any difference. Chikezie's turn on this one makes me wish he actually sang it last night, dang. Someone turned Ramiele's mic off! I want Syesha out of my life forever. The presence of Kristy makes the cameraperson have a conniption. Why does Amanda NOT get a solo on "Here There and Everywhere?" I don't understand! That song is SO HER!!! Oh boy, someone is really excited about using this rotating camera thingie! I'm dizzy! Make it stop! OK good it's over.
I'm happy they replay the Kristy upskirt alert for Chris' benefit: "Yipes!" I didn't notice how terrifying the cut of David A.'s jacket was last night. His stage parents scare the shit out of me, incidentally. Um, I got nothing else. Chris reminds me that "Here Comes the Sun" is a George song, which I completely forgot, likely because I was so mortified. OMG.
OMG behind the scenes of the Ford Music Video!!! It's a dream come true. Actually, I don't particularly like the magic and surprise being spoiled like this, so I take it all back. Ramiele still appreciates hair and makeup! OK, I take it back again as the surprise is entirely invested in the song choice: "Should I Stay or Should I Go." Wow. WOW. This, too, is just like KidSongs.
OK, let's cut people. Chop-chop!
From tears to laughter! She is delirious! What have we learned? Shut the F up about your failed career, as it reminds people you are a failure. Is that so difficult to understand?
What a shock! I'm surprised she didn't just walk right out into the bottom three section, honestly.
It's working. IT'S WORKING.
In a delicious turn of events, Simon and Paula proceed to get sassy with each other. Rrowr! How do you "download on" an iPod? I'm just curious. Michael seriously is on that meth. Watch him laugh like a nutcase after answering that question and try to convince me otherwise. Creepy!
You haven't lived until you've ridden home from the State Fair with a busful of sorority girls just let out of a Kellie Pickler concert. That is sarcasm. This poor lady has undergone a Jenna Jameson makeover, and I don't mean her boobs. Her face!!! Look at her face!!! WTF happened?! She has aged like 20 years since season 5. Someone never taught her that you don't clap your hands while holding a live mic! Well, maybe someone tried at some point. A valiant effort, I'm sure. Kellie and Simon get sassy with each other! How adorable, I mean creepy. She's less of an embarrassment than she was last year, I guess. I'm so generous.
OMG
OMG
OMG
OMG
OMG OMG OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG scruffy bearded Elliott helping the underprivileged in Africa. Oh and Fantasia too but OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG Elliott!!!!! Those malnourished kids are taller than he is. Aww, he's still an emotional young man. Aww! Ohh. Ohh! I still miss his old teeth, call me crazy. OK, if I get to see more of Elliott's dramatic caregiving sojourn into the hearts and minds of us all during "Idol Gives Back," sign me up. BRING IT.
Chris notes that they're seating Harry, the Guy With the Snake on His Face tattoo-side away from the camera. Carly is safe! She's blubbering! Who goes home?!
This just proves that if we all band together and think positively, we can move mountains and make magic happen. Why yes, Amanda, it HAS been a fun ride. Poncho power!
Tears are few and far between—actually, I think it's just Carly snivelling over herself some more. I have to admit that the dirty look Amanda shot RICKEY MINOR AND THE BAND! on that mess of a play-out made me believe, if ever so briefly, I may miss her a little bit. See, this show DOES make people insane.
OMGOMGOMGOMG Part 2, continued proof that Chris is awesome is that he taped me one of the truly great achievements in modern cinema, which is to say The Legend of Billie Jean, off Showtime HD so I can have it forever in DIGITAL CLARITY and its PROPER ASPECT RATIO. This is not on DVD!!! That is insane!!! I have to go now. FAIR IS FAIR!
Posted by Kim at March 19, 2008 10:33 PM | The Sound of Breaking GlassI am glad I wasn't the only one who was totally creeped out by Meth Man's maniacial laughter after his question. If he isn't on meth, then he's just wacko and that's bad, too.
I always appreciate how when they get the bottom three out there, they ask Paula if America got it right. She always says no, but by definition, there has to be a bottom three. It's got to be somebody. And oh yeah, I think America was spot-on, right Simon?
It certainly was apparent that Amanda didn't bond with her castmates as she wanted no hugs and there were no tears. Hit the barscene, lady, and there is NO way she is 23. None.
Posted by: pieman at March 20, 2008 04:39 AMI need to stop fast forwarding through the talking parts. I keep missing this meth stuff. Anyway, there is so much to say that I have to break it down in this fashion:
Issue #1: "This Is My No" makes my entire life worth living.
Issue #2: Scruffy Elliott crying (with real feeling and not for himself - recognize, Carly) made this almost watchable.
Issue #3: "Should I Stay or Should I Go" made me believe I had died (or at least fainted) and was watching this all from another dimension.
Issue #4: David Cook all the way! He is the best! Goooooo David!
Posted by: jane at March 20, 2008 11:40 AMBaha, "Meth Man"! Meth O.D. Man soon, I think.
Oh Jane, I am chilled to the core of my being that you and I independently admitted we would miss A.O., if only a little bit.
"Should I Stay or Should I Go" stunned me speechless.
I hope David C. plays TWO guitars next week. He's just that talented!!!!!!!!
Posted by: Kim at March 20, 2008 01:06 PMNext week's theme is allegedly "Songs From the Year You Were Born", which means with the exception of Archuleta and Meth Man, it's 80's Week AGAIN. Way to think that one through, Idol!
I am now angry at The Beatles for depriving us of the magic of iTunes Top 100 week.
Posted by: SchippeWreck at March 20, 2008 02:11 PMSee, this is why they should have kept A.O. in it. They could have had a song from 1949.
For the year you were born song day, I pick "I'm Not In Love," but only the part before the singing starts. And I will say, "I learned from Meth Man never to cut up a song."
Posted by: jane at March 20, 2008 04:35 PMI would love to see that:
Ahhhhhhhhhh
Ahhhhhhhhhh
Ahhhhhhhhhh
Ahhhhhhhhhh
*plink plink plink plink*
Ahhhhhhhhhh
We still have hope Syesha will bust out something from the age of ragtime and the megaphone.
iTunes Top 100 would have been so hot, because a) I would not have known anything and b) I most likely would have hated everything. Although is "Hold It Don't Drop It" on there? 'Cause you know I would do that one.
Songs From the Year You Were Born, hmm, I miss Crabby Appleton's "Go Back" by a year, dang. I'll have to think, hmm. Thinking hurts. Ooh, "Rehearsals for Retirement" by Phil Ochs! I wonder if they have that one?! Then I can show my different colors and textures bringing back the hotness on a ballad, yeah yeah.
Posted by: Kim at March 20, 2008 05:51 PMThe #1 song for the day I was born was "Teen Angel" by Mark Dinning. I would be all over that one! Jason Castro would be AWESOME on that one, man!
Posted by: pieman at March 20, 2008 06:09 PM