Beyoncé-ish

I'm tired of these people and we're not even close to the Top 12 yet. Dame. I personally would like to hear someone bust out "Answering Machine" tonight. Or perhaps "A Strange Place (The Alezby Inn)." TIP!!

She hears the ticking of the cock, apparently. I don't understand the strategy of doing songs that other contestants were known for "rocking" in previous years. And then having the background singers out-sing you. A.J. likes it! Well, then, I'm convinced. I still like her in that root for the underdoggy way.


Aww, she and her mom are so cute. Her little girl party dress is weird. I keep wanting to sing "Closing Time" along with this song, WHY IS THAT. I don't think this sounded as bad as the judges thought it sounded, WTF. I still like her for some crazy reason, like she's cute in a P.J. Soles kind of way, which is always a plus in my book. Not that that makes her more qualified to stay on this show.


She looks so cute tonight! Aww, and cute grandma. I love cute grandma. Why does it seem like she's only singing 40 percent of what she should be singing? Paula tells her she loves her. Oh, what a beautiful day of emotion. Simon doesn't like the outfit? Too colorful? The hell? This is backwards day.


Damn, girl.


I just don't care. I'm not being lazy or trying to get this over with 'cause it's late but I seriously do not care.


Oh wow, that was terrible. Oh hey, I guess she was SOBBING through the whole thing. Well then. I guess songs from Mulan do that to people. She finds solace in the loving embrace of Ryan Seacrest. Good gracious, who wouldn't.


She's adorable. I hope she doesn't do anything to make me hate her. Oh, oops, this song might actually do that. I mean, "Dangerously in Love" sounds F-ed up and falling off the rails on purpose. It is a long that ALWAYS sounds like crap. What an odd choice. I also don't believe anyone ever connects from voters when doing songs by: a) Alicia Keys b) Mary J. Blige c) Beyoncé. Oh well.


She has SUCH a Chicago accent. And oh WAIT, she's doing the A.J. song from yesterday? That is SUCH a BITCH MOVE. Along with wearing knee-length leggings under a skirt. That whole outfit is kind of sad. A drastic step backwards from last week. THE OUTFITS ARE ALL YOU HAVE. That ended really spazzily.


The picture of her and her boyfriend looks like a dating service Web ad. "I'm doing something hot tonight!" Oh wait a second, "Queen of the Night." I'm going to repeat that: "Queen of the Night." Once again, that's "Queen of the Night." Yes, "Queen of the Night." I am simply at a loss for words.


Oh no, the "he fills me up, he gives me love" song. KEY CHANGE! This is shrieky-ass-shrieky. Her outfit is crappy. Why does this end the show? Who is asleep at the switch? What am I doing here?

That ended badly. What a letdown. Oh, what was I expecting anyway.