Same old stories, same old thing

I'm not doing a very good job of keeping this place up, am I? I'll tell some stories.

I have a new job, a good job, a job that pays, a job that satisfies my artistic needs. That means I am in smoothed-out mode for the most part and basically not caring about much of anything, which is I guess like being on drugs without having to take drugs. Whoo.

I went to see an ophthalmologist today and my eyes are like a zillion times worse than they were two years ago. Well maybe not a zillion times, but I got an interesting reaction when they put up my current prescription for my left eye and asked me to read the eye chart and I could only read the three-letter line. And even then I was mostly guessing.

Chris: "Don't you get headaches?" Oh, yeah.

Oh YEAH. And my brother had his big 40th birthday party and made bacon cheeseburgers on Krispy Kremes. You know what they're called.

They were shockingly not disgusting and actually quite delicious.

I mean, look at that. LOOK AT IT. How can something that pretty be so bad for you?

Honestly.

One day at my new job I get a message on my voice mail. I pick it up and it is one of those robot voice pager things. The voice said:

I left you a check on the dining room table. Great show last night.

Intriguing! I wish robots would leave me checks on dining room tables. I saved the phone number for grins. I'll have to actually try and look it up someday, when I'm not lazy and coasting.

A few days later I get on the bus to go home and the seat that looks most appealing to me turns out to have a half-empty bottle of diet Coke lying on it. I sit down and drop it in the seat in front of me.

Some guy gets on later and sits in the outside seat of that row, so as not to disturb the half-empty bottle of diet Coke on the inside seat. OK. That guy gets off the bus. A woman sitting in the row ahead of that one on the other side of the aisle gets up and swear to God pounces on the half-empty bottle of diet Coke, brings it back to her seat and proceeds to drink it.

Good show.

Great show!

Posted by Kim at July 10, 2006 10:00 PM | Etc. | Non-Moving Pictures