You get what you get when you go for it

I'm so tired of "American Idol." It's true. I just don't care anymore. I was never this way when it got to the final two, or three, or whatever the last couple of years. Why am I so angry at this show? I mean, it's not like there haven't been people I've actively hated in the final two for the last two seasons or anything

uh-huh ayup

but man, I just don't care. Maybe this is the price I pay for swearing off voting this year. Or maybe this is a beautiful gift I should treasure forever. Anyway.

Aww poor thing. She's better off without this show and should go get a role on "Passions" or something. Maybe she can be Endorra when she gets to be, like, six months old. It's no less retarded than anything else they're doing on that show. Oh wait, I'm supposed to be complaining about "AI." OK. It's not like she was particularly great or anything and her song choices were crappy but it's just that smiley presence of cuteness, I can't help but be won over by it for some retarded reason. Also she's the only contestant I managed to like more as the show went on, so ... eh. That and fifty cents will get you two quarters. Maybe it's only me and everyone else of Filipino descent and everyone in Hawaii, but she's likable. Not hateable. I hate those hateable people.

You know, people like this worthless do-nothing. Oh man, oh God. First of all, she should have been forcibly removed from the premises on the merits of her outfit alone. Good Lord, people. American Idols do not wear flared polyester culottes. It's in the rule book. First song, sucked. Second song, sucked. And then, as if the evils of Clive Davis needed to be revealed to me any more clearly (thank you, Hit Men), he gives her "Don't Cry Out Loud" not just as an affront to all citizens of the world at large, but as a pointed gesture to offend me personally. You know it's true. I wish I could say "But baby can't be broken, 'cause you see, she was horrible and got booed off the stage and must pay millions of dollars in damages for human suffering," but instead everyone makes like this is the greatest development in musical history and now this creepo is going to "make it her own" a la Clay and "Solitaire." This is why I need to go live on a desert island for a while. It was the most horrifically nasal bellowey piece of crap I had ever heard in my life. And I'm not even a fan of the Melissa Manchester version, necessarily, but Peter Allen's version is one of the greatest things ever, with its alarming pathos and layers upon layers of subtext, if not outright text. Make it her own, my butt. I hate this show.

Yay! Great! Whatever! I mean I guess I like her and everything, and sure I'd rather see her win over Eew Girl, Eew up there, but I'm not going to be biting my nails in anticipation or horribly thrilled that justice has been served. I wouldn't feel that way with anyone on this show this year, I guess. Oh man, the magic is gone. Yay! Great! Whatever!

Posted by Kim at May 20, 2004 08:10 PM | The Sound of Breaking Glass